The Watley Review is dedicated to the production of articles completely without journalistic merit or factual basis, as this would entail leaving our chairs or actually working. Names, places and events are generally fictitious, except for public figures about which we may have heard something down at the pub. All contents are intended as parody and should be construed as such. We have no agenda other than the depletion of Uncle Zeke's whaling trust fund and the dutiful appreciation of smooth, smooth liquor. The Review is updated every Tuesday or when the hangovers wear off, whichever comes first.

The Watley Review is intended for those of legal voting age and older. That's 18, in case you were wondering.

All contents of The Watley Review, including original images, are copyright © 2003-2010, all rights reserved. The terms "Watleyreview.com," "The Watley Review," the photograph of our esteemed Editor, and the Watley Review logo are trademarks of The Watley Review, all rights reserved. Unauthorized reproduction of this material in any format is prohibited. Do us a favor and don't steal our stuff; surely you have better things to do. Websites are permitted to reproduce up to 150 words of any given article (about a paragraph or two - not the whole article please!) provided there is an accompanying link to the full article on our website. For hard-copy reprint requests, please contact us.

The Watley Review sends an update when new articles are posted to those who have joined our mailing list. Email addresses submitted to our mailing list will be stored securely in a tobacco tin and will not be used for any other purpose, nor will the information ever be shared with others. Anyone wishing to be removed from our mailing list may do so by contacting us at any time.

We link to other websites for a good reason, usually because we think they are worth a visit, sometimes because we are being blackmailed. Please note that, while we don't knowingly link to sites with offensive or illegal content, The Watley Review is not responsible for the content of external sites. Most sites we link to, like our site, are intended for those 18 years and older.

Privacy notice

The Watley Review uses webserver logs and a third-party service, StatCounter, to collect information about how our website is used. StatCounter uses cookies. Information gathered through cookies and the logs may include the date and time of visits, the pages viewed, time spent browsing The Watley Review, and what link you followed to get here, if any. The cookies are placed and read by StatCounter.com. The Watley Review does not store any information about visitors other than what is noted in our server's logs. We don't share the information with anyone. Actually we don't understand most of the information our server collects, so you can rest assured that nothing pernicious is being done with the information.

All of this is pretty basic, actually, and if you do not wish to accept the StatCounter cookie, just tell your browser to reject it. Our webamagraph site works perfectly well with cookies disabled.

In the event that you decide to send us an Electro-Mail, we may use part or all of your message on our Letters page (unless you specifically ask us to keep your message private), except for your email address, which we won't share with anyone. Ditto for your address if you are for some reason inspired to sign up for the "Fresh Cup of Watley" update newsletter. Your electro-mail address will be stored securely in a virtual tobacco-tin and never shared, lent, or sold for any reason whatsoever.

The bottom line is that we can barely keep our Difference-Engines running and it's pretty laughable to suppose that we would even be capable of doing anything with your personal information if we were inclined to do so, which we're not.

Send us your comments, questions, or subpoenas. No, wait, not that last one. Stick to questions and comments.